Kids and Grandparents: Gifts

 

Grandparents Giving to Their Granddaughter

As a child, some of my fondest memories were those of my grandmother deciding it was time to take me shopping. We would go to my grandmother’s  favorite department store where she would have me try on dress after dress after dress. Of course, back then, we only wore dresses to school. She would then decide which ones she liked, to add to my closet at home. She did not consult with anyone else about whether she should buy the dresses, or whether they were appropriate,  or whether my mother would approve. She liked them, and I liked them; so that was all that mattered. This didn’t happen very often, but when it did, I felt like a princess as I modeled each one for my grandfather later that evening.

Now, as a grandmother, it is my privelege to purchase gifts for my grandchildren of my choosing. But I have discovered, that those gifts are not always received with gratefulness. I have two daughters that gladly accept anything given to their children; whether I decide to buy clothes, toys, furniture for their rooms, or whatever. They are thankful for the financial support I’m able to provide to improve their child’s life. They may frown sometimes, but they allow the child to retain the gifts and enjoy them. On the other hand, I have another daughter that is extremely particular about what her children wear; therefore, I gave up trying to buy clothes for them because they ended up in the garage sale with the tags still on them. For the children’s birthdays and Christmas, we would buy toys, but she kept them put up, so they couldn’t play with them; because she didn’t want the mess. Blocks, Legoes, Thomas the Train…. all still in the box, in the closet. What did the children do all day? Watch TV. Play video games. Anything that required sitting still, no mess, no noise. We gave up trying to buy gifts. When asked what to get the boys, ages 9 and 12, we are told “i tunes Cards”. Now what kind of surprise gift is that? They really never learned how to play, or be creative. When other children come around, they don’t know what to do. Whatever happened to the days of being thankful for what you are given?

Nursery Rhyme Rocker

I’ve come to realize that I am not the only grandparent experiencing the same feelings of rejection over the items I might buy for my grandchildren. As customers are shopping in my store, they will see something that they think their grandchildren would love; then, I hear the statement, “I’ll have to check with my daughter(or daughter-in-law) to see if it is okay. She’s kind of picky about what I can buy and can’t buy.” Here are loving grandparents wanting to buy gifts for their grandchildren. Grandparents shouldn’t have to ask permission first before buying gifts; after all they are the elders of our society that should be honored and respected.

All Star Rocker

The item that most grandparents favor are our Rock a Buddies Rockers. These are our beautifully handcrafted and hand decorated heir-looms-to-be Rocking Chairs. Many of these chairs make sounds from sirens, to animal sounds, to nursery rhymes, while others have built in picture frames for your precious loved one. One rocker has a very unique feature with a cradle on the side of the rocker for her doll.  There is a special understamp beneath the seat that the customer can personalize with the child’s name, the name of the gift-giver and the special occasion when the chair was received. A photo greeting card is included so the child can say “THANK YOU” in a memorable way! The chair is designed for the child ages 3-8 years of age with different theme for each chair such as: All Star Sports Rocker, Barn to Rock Rocker, Our Little Hero Rocker, School House Rocker, Nursery Rhyme Rocker, and many more that you can find on our website www.babyiture.com. We, also, have toddler-size versions of several popular designs, with the same attention to quality and detail! These are solid wood rockers, held together with bolts, to last beyond a lifetime. Fifty years from now, when it comes out of an attic somewhere, the bottom of the rocker will remind them where this Little Rock a Buddy came from along with the generosity and love it was given.

Our Little Hero

Grandparents shouldn’t have to ask for permission to give a gift. Giving is from the heart, out of love. Children should be taught to accept the gift with love and gratitude, always remembering to say “Thank you”, no matter what the gift.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Share

Kid’s and Grandparents: Grandparents’ Time Out

Grandparents’ Time Out

When my husband and I retired, we built our retirement home on beautiful Lake Cherokee with plans to travel. Each daughter wanted to know which bedroom belong to their family. Since we reside on the lake, they plan to visit more often, for longer periods of time, bringing with them the children, dogs, and cats. Along with this we are the primary caregivers four days a week for Miley, our youngest granddaughter, one year old this week; while her mother, a new single parent, works at the hospital and attends college. We have kept all of our grandchildren on a daily basis since their birth, during these past seven years.  At times our home is busy as a beehive. These are moments we will treasure forever; although, stressful at times.

Grandparent's Time OutPeace

The number of grandparents raising their childrens’ children is increasing both in Texas and around the nation. The U.S. Census Bureau’s 2008 American Community Survey estimates almost 299,000 Texas grandparents are doing it, a nearly 7 percent increase from 2005. Nationally, more than 2.6 million grandparents are raising grandchildren, a jump of more than 6 percent since 2005, the survey found.  (O’Hare, 2010).

Taking Care of Yourself

Grandparents take on this obligation when the grandchildren’s own parents are busy working, going to school, abandon them, or can no longer live with them due to medical reasons. Over a period of time, caring for grandchildren does put stress on the grandparents’ relationship. There is the loss of time with each other and their dream of retirement dies. Their social life and circle of friends dwindles drastically. But, despite considerable financial challenges of supporting a child on a fixed income; and health problems, grandparents make numerous sacrifices to provide a better life for their grandchildren. Grandparents become caregivers of their grandchildren whether full time or part time because they see no alternative.  They were raised during a time that you take care of family—and family was the most important thing to them.  There’s lots of love there.

Grandparents with GrandkidsGrandparents with Grandkids

But if they are feeling stressed, overwhelmed, and tired, they are not going to be able to provide the best care for their grandchildren.  It’s important they take care of themselves and not become overwhelmed by their parental responsibilities. Here are some suggestions to help relieve the stress:

  • Find a support group – either a group specifically for grandparents raising grandchildren or some other support group where you can share your challenges with others who will understand.
  • Talk to someone. This could be a friend or relative or a professional, such as a counselor, family doctor, or someone at your church or temple. Unburdening yourself can be a stress reliever.
  • Find respite care. A short time away from your grandchildren may give you some time to relax. Look for a trusted adult who can babysit or take over while you’re out. Grandparents who have access to and use respite are able to be more effective and resilient caregivers.(National Resource Center for Respite and Crisis Care Center , 1998)
  • Take a parenting class. A class may help you to feel more comfortable with your status as caregiver for young children. It will also provide resources in the form of your teacher and the other students in the class.
  • Learn to say “no”. You don’t have time to do everything. Learn to make priorities, and eliminate the unnecessary tasks in your life.
  • Find resources. There is lots of useful free information for grandparents. Much of it is available on the Internet.(Child Welfare Services, 2010). One example is listed below.

http://www.usa.gov/Topics/Grandparents.shtml

<a href=’Popout

Child Welfare Services. (2010, April 30). Grandparents Raising Grandchildren. Retrieved June 8, 2010, from Child Welfare Information Gateway: http://www.childwelfare.gov/preventing/supporting/resources/grandparents.cfm

O’Hare, P. (2010, January 18). More Grandparent Parenting Again. Retrieved June 8, 2010, from ThirdAge Articles: http://www.choicerelationships.com/third_age_articles.html

Share

Memorial Day Memories

As I look at the United States Flag in the Memorial case given in honor of my father by the honor guard during his funeral service, I think about the true meaning of Memorial Day. He was proud to be a Marine that served at IowaJima. Memorial Day became a federal holiday to honor our war veterans on 1866. Their gravestones are marked with American flags during the three day weekend and American flags are flown at half-staff from morning till noon. Some towns have parades and concerts; the National Memorial Day Concert takes place on the White House west lawn. But the true meaning of Memorial Day has been lost, since it was changed to a Monday to give a three day weekend. Memorial Day is celebrated different ways by families. Many families gather to spend a long weekend together to launch the beginning of summer. My family is no different.

For the past thirty years, we celebrated Memorial Day at the same place with the same people, honoring the family; although, our family structure changed during those years. Thirty years ago, my brother, my parents, my husband and I purchased a home on Lake Cherokee. Every weekend we remodeled another section of the cabin to make it usable for our needs. Gradually, the work leveled off and more lake activities began to take over. As my family size increased, my mother would watch the children while we played on the lake. When dinner time came, all the women would gather in the kitchen to put the finishing touches on the meal that my mother had usually cooked. My brother married after a few years, and then everything just tripled, with my parents the hub cap of the wheel. Every Memorial Day we opened the lake house for the summer season with the family spending the long weekend together.

Now, thirty years later, a few things are different. Instead of my parents being the hubcap for the spokes, my husband and I maintain the center of the wheel. Our three daughters and their families showed up for this three day weekend full of excitement for the new season. Who keeps the children while their parents are on the lake tubing?  Our daughters assume that we, Grammy and Grampy, will keep the kids. My role has followed that of my mother’s, watching the children and preparing the meals. Today for lunch, not only were the women in the kitchen, but the men were there, also.  They were washing dishes, preparing the meat, cooking the meat, discussing which rubs to put on the meats. The role of the male in the kitchen has changed drastically since the onset of our lake experiences. The interaction of all the daughters, spouses, and their father in the kitchen cooking together created an image of the meaning of family not to be forgotten. Even after thirty years, some things haven’t changed, my brother and his family, and my mother still came for lunch, giving thanks for another year together with an ever growing and changing family.  Tradition is still there this Memorial Day, with the focus still on the family,  just the size and center of the family has changed.

http://www.usmemorialday.org/backgrnd.html

 
Share
Tinkerbell Personal Checks |Garden Planters | Jewellery For Women | Best Dog Foods | Budget Wedding Gowns | Shop For Jewellery | Vintage Jewellery| Diamante Jewellery | Car Finance Credit | DoorStep Loans